Welcome back freakshows!
freakshow: someone who is f***ed up, sloppy, especially when gathered together with equally f***ed up troops
Now it has occurred to me that many of you don't even know the first thing about bugging out. You may think a hike involves running shoes, paved trails, and that stupid plastic spork from MEC, so I've decided to begin by outlining the 5 fundamental phases of a bug-out:
1. Plotting a route.
2. Packing your rucksack.
3. Hiking the route
4. Setting up camp for the night
(Repeat steps 3 and 4 as required)
5. Consolidating on your final destination
Now step 1 is the most important. If you fail at the first step, step 2 will stumble, and step 3 will leave you collapsed, panting on all fours - and not in a fun way.
This leads me to...
Bug Out Tip #2 - Plot a route that avoids the beaten path.
Highways are for Japanese imports that can't break trail in the bush. As a mobile biped, the world is your freeway. Cut through the woods, where you will remain unseen by walkers, vigilante checkpoints, and bums asking for change at the red light. All equally uncomfortable experiences.
Now for those of you who couldn't navigate your way through a whorehouse with a fistful of fifties, you're going to want to learn some basic navigation skills.
Start here: backcountryattitude.com
Invest in a good compass and map. You can print out custom topographical maps at mytopo.com
Manage these skills, and your bug-out route will be more concealed than a Filipino ladyboy's penis.
- Deidter "The Soldier" Stadnyk